Some Cool Vids

Check these vidoes out.  They’re hilarious/cool.  Sorry they’re not embeded, but I’m too stupid to figure out how to do that so you’ll just have to click on the links if you want to see the coolness.

UPDATE: Check out Lil Rocker.  He’s probably already more bad ass than anyone you know, and he still wears a diaper. 

Did Roger Clemens admit to using steroids on video?  You be the judge.

What would a dog say to you if you could speak bark?

Dude’s got vicious chops.  Mario would be proud.

DO NOT TAKE AWAY THE WHOPPER!

I laughed so hard it hurt.  I probably deserve to go to hell for that but whatever, half-jews/semi-atheists don’t believe in hell anyways.

NBA Buyout Bonanza

Along with playing the role of back-up point guard for the Celtics, Mighty Mouse, a former Jail Blazer, could supply the team with all the purple haze necessary for more pyro shows like the one that covered the court on opening night.

Our prayers have been answered.  Assuming the rumored Damon Stoudamire buyout goes through and he chooses to take the mantle of back-up point guard from Tony Allen for the Celtics, Boston will become my prohibitive NBA Title favorites (yes, I realize they have the best record in the NBA so that’s not saying much, but this is the team’s one major flaw being answered, so it’s a pretty big deal).  I don’t expect Sam Cassell to be bought out anyways, since he has value and Boston would have a hard time making much of an offer for the guy, so this is almost the perfect scenario.

Folks have also bandied about some Theo Ratliff buyout rumors, and ESPN.com’s John Hollinger mentioned the possibility of Ratliff signing with the Celtics before the end of the season as well in a chat today:

 John Hollinger: Ratliff is definite buyout material and is likely to be back with the Celtics by March. I think Minnesota will resign Gomes — he’s restricted and it’s not like there’s a huge market for him, and since McHale overpays all his free agents there’s no reason for him to leave. 

Pete (Minneapolis, MN): If Mchale buys out Ratliffs contract for more than a $1, I am going to…I’m so mad just thinking about it. Why not just let it slide off the books or use it as trade value?

 John Hollinger: I don’t think you get it — they’d pay him less than they’d otherwise owe, permitting him to sign somewhere else. It’s a win-win. Ratliff has no trade value because he makes like $11 million (going from memory), but if he agrees to go away for less than that amount then the Wolves would be fools not to say sayonara. 
 

 

Theo Ratliff could be back in Boston by the end of the season, giving the team a nice defensive spark off the bench at the back-up center spot.  While Stoudamire provides the smoke show, Theo can bring extra back braces in case anyone gets hurt.

Given that these two additions would bolster the team’s depth at crucial spots with play-off tested veterans, the chances of us witnessing Green 17 raised to the roof in November will get even better should one or both of these prospective buyouts and subsequent signings occur.  Besides, anything that pushes Brian Scalabrine further towards being the last man sitting (i.e. the 15th man on the roster) is a good thing.

Dotel, Tulowitzki, and Molina Reaction

 

The guy on the left is Vladimir Dotel, not Octavio, which is too bad, because if Octavio were Daddy Yankee’s pana, he’d be a lot cooler than the 67th boring middle reliever recently added to the White Sox that he is.

The White Sox have signed Octavio Dotel for two years and $11 million in guaranteed money.  The deal itself is fine, since Dotel showed his stuff is still solid by striking out 41 and walking 12 in 30.2 innings last seaso; the problem is the South-siders still lack another starter or two before I’m willing to consider them as much more than an 80-85 win team.

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Troy Tulowitzki is about to sign a record-breaking extension for a player with so little service time, but it’s not going to break the bank for the Rockies.  $30 million over the next 6 years is likely within a few million either way of what Tulo would have made if he continues on his path to stardom, but it takes some pressure off of both sides.  Given that he has always been expected to play at such a high level, I have no qualms with this deal, although it was quite unnecessary on management’s part.

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Cardinals catcher and the youngest of the slowest catching trio to ever grace the Majors, Yadier Molina, signed for 4 years and $15.5 million.  This prevents Molina from dealing with the insulting/annoying arbitration process and pays him pretty well no matter what happens from here out.  If he follows up his improvement offensively in 2007 with a few more positive steps he’ll become one of the best overall catchers in the game, given his tremendous arm and receiving skills.  He’ll turn just 26 this coming July.

Halfway There: Who’s the First-Half NBA MVP?

Tyson Chandler, David West, et al aren’t bad, but without my first-half MVP Chris Paul New Orleans would be back in the lottery.  Oh, and the Hornets wear some pretty colorful shoes don’t they?

Since we’ve finally (roughly) reached mid-season in the NBA, it’s time for my first-half MVP ballot: 

1. Chris Paul–CP3 is having one of the best seasons ever for a point guard, and his PER trails only LeBron.  Throw that in with his ability to lead an otherwise average team to within a game of the top spot in the bloodbath that is the West and Paul gets my vote.
2. Kevin Garnett–KG is the second best player in the East and the best player on the best team in the entire league so far.  His play has been exceptional, and his presence completely transformed the Celtics from losers to the Spurs of the East, with their phenomenal commitment to defense.  The Boston Three Party has mostly been a two-headed monster this season with Ray Allen’s struggles, so KG’s contributions have been even more important than we originally thought they would be.
3. LeBron James–He’s the best player on the planet.  If he hadn’t missed any games and his team were slightly more than laughable excluding the King himself, he’d be the obvious MVP pick even with Paul and KG having such fantastic seasons.  But, since the MVP award generally places importance on winning, and treading water in the putridity that is the East does not qualify as such, LeBron will have to wait to begin his trophy reign until he gets some decent teammates.
4. Kobe Bryant–9th in PER, 2nd in scoring, and his team is one game back of Phoenix, in third place overall on the left coast conference. 
5. Chauncey Billups–He’s the best player on the second best team in the  East and is in the middle of a career year.  He’s money.

Honorable Mentions: Dwight Howard, Tim Duncan, Steve Nash, Paul Pierce, Caron Butler, Chris Bosh, Amare Stoudamire, Manu Ginobili